


One Shots for Yesterday is Gone

by BoxedWine



Category: Captain America (Movies), Captain America - All Media Types, Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Angst, Bucky Barnes Feels, Bucky Barnes Needs a Hug, Domestic Avengers, Established Relationship, F/M, Fluff and Angst, Fluff and Smut, Love, One Shot Collection, Protective Bucky Barnes, Romance, Smut
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-25
Updated: 2018-09-18
Packaged: 2019-07-02 10:27:51
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 19
Words: 14,995
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15794655
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BoxedWine/pseuds/BoxedWine
Summary: This work is a collection of one-shots from the lives of Bucky and the Reader from my story Yesterday Is Gone. To know their full story and how they got together, I recommend reading that, but you don't have to. These will jump around in time.





	1. Drunk Bucky

I’m curled up on the couch reading my book when I hear the guys coming home from a night out of bonding. It’s the first time Bucky has agreed to go out with a big group. They are so loud I can hear them in the elevator.

“Y/N, you have got to see this!” Sam whoops when the door opens.

“Where’s my Aaaangel?” I hear Bucky say.

I stand up as the door fills with large men. Steve has his arm around Bucky holding him up. He is trying and failing to contain a smile.

When Bucky sees me his entire face lights up. “Baaaaaby!” he slurs. He lunges away from Steve and wraps his arms around me. We almost fall over but Steve catches both of us. 

“Sorry, Y/N, we may have let him get carried away tonight.” Steve snorts.

He helps Bucky settle on the couch and Bucky immediately grabs my hips and hauls me into his lap. “Look at her, guuuuys,” he says. “God, she’s perfect.”

I can smell whiskey and something else on him. I give him a peck on the cheek and turn to Steve smiling. “I thought you two couldn’t get drunk.”

“I’m afraid it’s on me,” Thor replies from the doorway. “I was generous with the Asgardian liquor. But we’ve had quite the merry time!”

“Thank God for the liquor because your boyfriend was bound and determined to drink whiskey shots until Stark Industries was bankrupt,” Tony says, pouring himself another drink at the small bar. “And that’s right, boys, the party isn’t over.” He pours another drink for Clint. “Well it may be over for your boy toy,” he says, looking at Bucky as he tries to stand up while still holding me and falls back down on the couch. I thump against his chest and start giggling.

“You’re a mess, Bucky.”

No, you’re a mess.”

“How am I a mess?”

“You’re not a mess! Who the hell said you were a mess? I’ll kill them because you’re fucking perfect!” 

Sam is laughing hysterically. “It was Tony. Tony said it.”

Bucky’s eyes go wide and he looks at Tony who is smart enough to defuse, rather than exacerbate, the situation for once. “Barnes, your girlfriend is wonderful. An angel among us.”

“I know. I love her so much.”

Eyes go wide and the other guys turn away as they smile. They have never seen Bucky like this. And while he’s openly affectionate toward me, public declarations of love aren’t exactly something he’s famous for. Steve is the only one who doesn’t hide the huge smile on his face. 

“I’ll help you get him into bed,” Steve smiles. We stand up on each side of Bucky, supporting him as he stumbles down the hall. 

“My bes friend and my bes gurl,” Bucky slurs happily as FRIDAY opens the door to our room. Steve lowers him onto the bed and I start unlacing his shoes. 

“Stevie, how did I get so luuucky?”

“Because you deserve it, Buck,” Steve replies. I blush.

“You gotta go now, Stevie.”

“Um, okay?”

“I gotta make love to my girl.”

Now Steve blushes and I cover my face.

“Sweetie, you are gonna be passed out in two minutes.” I shake my head.

“Umm, you good? I think that’s my cue to go,” Steve says awkwardly.

“I got it from here.”

“Well Bucky, good luck with the hangover. Hope you fare better than I did after the coaster on Coney Island.”

Bucky giggles. “That was soooo funny. You barfed eeeeverywhere.”

Steve rolls his eyes and gives me a smile as he closes the door behind him.

“Baby, come here. You look sexy in that sweatshirt. Wanna take it off you.”  
I give him a quick peck on the lips but manage to jump away before he grabs me with his dulled reflexes.

“I’ll be right back, gorgeous. I’m going to brush my teeth and freshen up.” I wink at him.

“Yesss. Then I will ravish you.” Bucky’s eyes are half closed, but they pop open as he starts to struggle out of his shirt. 

I step into the bathroom and take my time washing my face and getting ready. Before I step out, I listen carefully at the door.

I approach the bed where Bucky is totally passed out, snoring softly with his shirt wrapped around his head like he got stuck. I take a moment to appreciate his abs before I pull the shirt the rest of the way off. I unbutton his jeans and struggle to pull them off. I leave him to sleep in his boxer briefs. He’s at a weird angle with his legs partly off the bed, but there’s no way I can move him. I nudge a pillow under his head and turn off the light. I snuggle next to him, also at a crooked angle, and pull a loose blanket over us.

“Love you, doll,” he mumbles.

“I love you, too, sweetie.


	2. Soldier Bucky

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Yikes. I got angsty for this one. I'll lighten the mood again on the next one.

The mission didn’t go as planned. HYDRA’s intel was shitty, but that doesn’t mean they won’t take it out on him. He was sent to kill the Prime Minister and was unable to do so. Repercussions will filter down the line, ending with him.

The Soldier waits in his room quietly. He knows they will come for him at any moment. Rather than think about what lies ahead, he conjures the woman’s face in his mind. He hasn’t seen her for a while he doesn’t think, but it’s hard to be sure. The passage of time is confusing. Most of the time he feels numb, but when he thinks of her, a strange feeling comes over him. He’s not sure what it is, only that it is pleasant and nothing like how he feels after they wipe him or when he’s on missions.

She’s beautiful, he thinks. And her skin is so soft. He loves touching her because she is the opposite of everything in his life. She is the warmth and light in his cold, dark cell. She gives tender touches where everyone else in his life causes pain.

He hears the guards coming down the hall. Two have weapons trained on him and the other two drag him roughly down the hall, even though it’s unnecessary. It’s not like he won’t just come. What choice is there? But they’ve likely heard from their superiors and are eager to return the favor.

He blocks them out as his feet move and imagines her underneath him, her hands in his hair, her lips moving against his, her smooth skin under his calloused hands. Warmth spreads throughout his body as he nearly forgets where he is. He wonders if he’ll see her again soon. If he’ll remember her when she comes. The only thing he knows is that he will die before letting any of these men get their hands on her or even know she exists. They would make him kill her and then he’d have nothing. The thought tears at his soul and nearly makes him crumple to the ground. 

He’s shoved into the chair. The men are talking. Apparently they have new intel and intend to try the mission again, but first they will wipe him and start over. 

“откинуть назад,” snaps a guard.  
(Lean back).

The Soldier imagines her hair in his hands. He’s stroking it softly and she’s peppering kisses on his jaw. He doesn’t move.

The guard hits him across the face. The Soldier reclines, but otherwise doesn’t acknowledge the hit. He accepts the mouthguard grudgingly.

He closes his eyes and imagines the feel of having her under the blanket huddled against him on his small cot. She wraps her arms around him tightly and tells him how strong he is and that one day everything will be okay. He doesn’t know why she believes such things, but he still loves to hear her voice saying it. 

The metal plates close on his head. This time he won’t forget her. He won’t let them take her. He focuses on her face. He concentrates on the memory of her even as he’s screaming.

He can hear the words and she’s starting to fragment. He concentrates harder.

Желание.  
(Longing)

She splinters in his mind, but he pulls her back together like a jigsaw puzzle. 

“You are so strong. You are a survivor,” she’s saying to him.

Доброкачественный.  
(Benign)

She getting blurry again. He grips the arm rests tightly as he gives everything he has in an effort to hang on to her. 

Возвращение домой.  
(Homecoming)

She’s slipping away. He screams.

грузовой вагон.  
(Freight car)

He goes still.

Солдат?  
(Soldier?)

готовы соблюдать.  
Ready to comply.

 

She’ll remind him.


	3. Daddy Bucky

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lightening the mood after yesterday's emotional turmoil ;)

Bucky’s fingers tap anxiously on the steering wheel as he makes his way to his home just a few miles from the Avenger compound. He pulls in and takes one last glimpse in the rearview mirror to make sure he’s presentable. He has a bandage above his eye, but other than that, Dr. Cho did wonders cleaning him up after the mission. 

He opens the door from the garage into the kitchen softly since it’s getting late and he doesn’t want to wake anyone. But almost immediately he hears voices coming from the bedroom.

“I hear Daddy,” he hears Y/N say. That’s unlikely, but she did probably hear the beep of Stark’s security system when Bucky alerted FRIDAY he was approaching.

“Daddy, daddy, daddy!” Ethan yells, charging through the bedroom door and slamming into Bucky’s legs in the hallway.

“Hey, buddy!” Bucky says, hauling him up face-to-face.

“Daddy, I saw a fire truck! It came to school!”

“You did? Is the school ok?” Bucky asks smiling.

“Yeah! We sat in driving seat. Andy tried to steal my turn but he didn’t!”

“That’s awesome, buddy.”

“I’m gonna be a fireman.”

“You are? I thought you said you wanted to be Iron Man?”

“Noooo. Fireman.”

Bucky stands Ethan on the bed and whips his phone out and starts recording video.

“Ethan, what did you say you want to be when you grow up?”

“A fireman!”

“So you don’t want to be Iron Man anymore.”

“No! Fireman is better!”

Bucky sticks the phone back in his pocket. “Thanks, buddy.”

He turns to Y/N and embraces her tightly. “That video ought to shut his gloating ass up. I’ve been hearing about this for months.”

Y/N smothers a laugh in his chest and wraps her arms around him.

“I missed you, baby,” Bucky says, kissing the top of her head. “I hate these longer missions.”

“Me, too,” she says leaning back and inspecting his face. Her fingers brush lightly near the bandage. “You look like you came out alright. Anything else I should know about?”

“Nothing major. A few bruises and cuts. They’ll be gone by morning probably.”

Bucky presses his lips to hers and kisses her softly. She moves her arms to wrap around his neck. “It’s good to be home,” he murmurs.

“DAAADDDY! It’s my turn!” Ethan starts jumping on the bed. “Wanna sleep with you tonight!”

“I bet Mommy’s been letting you sleep in here all week while I have been gone, hasn’t she?”

“I had to protect her. Like how Falcon protects people.”

“Oh gee, did Uncle Sam visit while I was gone?” Bucky turns to roll his eyes at Y/N, who turns around to hide her laughter. 

“‘Yeah, he said he protect you mostly at work but this week he protect us.”

“Daddy will be sure to give him a big thank you next time I see him.”

Bucky turns to me and mutters, “Can I have FRIDAY ban him from the premises?”

Y/N gives him a kiss on the cheek. “Go shower so we can all get in bed. You’ve eaten, right?”

“Yeah, baby. I’ll be right out.”

When Bucky steps out out of the bathroom, Ethan is snuggled up to Y/N in bed watching a cartoon. He stands in the doorway and feels that familiar pleasant out-of-body experience he often experiences when he takes a step back and looks at his life. He can’t believe they’re real and that he ended up here. 

Y/N looks over and sees him watching. She takes in his form, clad only in gray sweatpants, and shakes her head. “What are you doing to me?” she asks as she glances down at Ethan. 

Bucky smiles as he crawls onto the bed and hovers over both of them. He leans in to tickle Ethan’s face with his scruff.

Ethan shrieks, “Daddy!”

Then Bucky leans into Y/N’s ear. “I’m taking him to his room as soon as he’s asleep, believe me.”

“Daddy, I can’t see!”

“Sorry, buddy.” Bucky relaxes on the other side of the 3-year-old. Ethan wraps his arms around Bucky’s vibranium one. He’s out in five minutes. They give him another five to make sure he’s completely out and Bucky carries him to his bed.

When he returns to the room, Y/N smirks at him, as she pulls her t-shirt over her head. “Let’s go, Soldier,” she says.

“Yes, ma’am!”


	4. Kinky Y/N

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Smutty McSmut Smut

Bucky’s tongue darts over my clavicle and he kisses his way back up to my mouth. I press my hands to his chest and push. He complies and rolls over on his back, pulling me on top of him.

“I bought something for us,” I say, then sweep my tongue between his lips.

“Really? And what would that be?”

I reach over and pull open the bedside drawer. Fuzzy black handcuffs dangle from my fingers. Bucky’s eyes widen. He sits up and inspects them. He looks a little apprehensive, though he relaxes when he realizes they have a release on the side and don’t actually require the key.

“I’m not sure if I…” he trails off.

“They’re for me, not you!” I interject quickly, realizing I did not think this through at all. “I mean, I wouldn’t expect you to wear them. I just thought it might be fun for you to put them on me.”

“Oh. Okay,” he says. He looks them over again and gives me a sexy smile.

I climb into his lap facing him, pressing against his hardness and moving my hips slowly. He clutches my hips and moans into my mouth. I lie back on the pillow and put my hands above me by the headboard. He leans over me and opens one of the cuffs, resulting in a metallic clicking sound. He freezes and stares at it. Then he pulls back and sits with his legs folded under him. He looks at me and bites his lip nervously.

“What’s wrong, Buck? It’s okay. I just thought it would be fun. We don’t have to use them.”

“I can’t,” he says quietly. “I know it’s for fun and there’s nothing wrong with it. Please, I don’t want to make you feel bad. I’d do anything to make you happy, but-”

I crawl over to him and caress his face. “But? What’s wrong?”

“I can’t put metal restraints on you. Not even covered in fur. I just can’t do it,” he says quietly. “I know it won’t hurt you, but I just...I can’t. I’m so sorry.”

I throw my arms around his neck.

“Bucky, I’m so sorry. I bought them on a whim. I didn’t think this through at all. I’m an idiot. Please forgive me.”

“Nothing to forgive. I don’t want you to think I’m too boring-”

“Boring!” I exclaim. “Bucky, we have incredible sex. I just worry I’m not making it spicy enough for you. I don’t need this. It was just a spur of the moment purchase after I had too much wine with lunch. I’m a moron for thinking metal handcuffs were a good idea.”

“You are not a moron. And I think we have incredible sex, too, baby. Maybe we can try something else? Something softer?” He jumps up and pulls a couple of my scarves from a drawer.

“Only if you’re comfortable,” I tell him seriously. “This is NOT something I need. You are all I need.”

“We’ll try it,” he smiles. He kisses each wrist before tying it gently to the headboard. “How does it feel?”

“Mmmm. Hot,” I say, licking my lips.

He stands up and takes off his clothes, flinging them onto the floor.

“I’m already regretting this,” I say with a smile. “God, I just want to touch you everywhere. That body. Damn.”

Bucky smiles and crawls over me. He leans down and licks my neck. I push up into him. He captures my mouth and I thrust my hips up feeling his erection. He hisses and moves down to lick my nipples. I grasp him with my knees and push his body up.

“I want to taste you,’ I tell him.

He straddles my chest and I lift my head. My tongue swirls around the tip of his cock. My mouth opens wider and he gently thrusts into my mouth, carefully watching my face to make sure I’m okay. My desire to run my hands over his v-lines, coupled with my inability to follow through is making me so turned on I can barely stand it. I take him in as far as I can, tongue pressed to the underside of his cock. He has one hand in my hair and the other is likely leaving dents in the headboard. He throws his head back and gasps. I release him with a pop. He scoots his body back down to kiss me again while running hands up and down my sides. They slide from my hips slowly up to my shoulders and then he’s cupping my chin while placing kisses all over my face. He nuzzles into my neck and alternates licks, kisses and soft little nips. 

“No one has ever touched me the way you do, Y/N. You are so beautiful and amazing,” he whispers in my ear.

His lips move down my body, pausing to spend extra time on my stomach and at my hips. Then he spreads my legs and lowers himself between them. He proceeds to tease me by running his tongue everywhere but where I want it. I start to struggle against the scarves out of the desire to grab his hair and guide his head. He snickers at my efforts then presses his tongue to my clit. He circles slowly as my back arches and I moan.

His tongue sweeps from my clit to my entrance and back again. I feel like I’m going to explode from the sensations.

“Bucky, I want you inside me. Now, please.”

He gets on his knees then sits back on his legs. He pulls my pelvis to him, legs on either side of him. His cock is at my entrance and he slowly slides inside me. My legs are hanging over his forearms as he holds my lower half up to continue thrusting into me. We stare into each other’s eyes as his thrusts speed up. I watch the muscles in his arms and abs contract, the sweat slowly start to build on his chest. Oh I want to touch him. Need to touch him.

“I have to touch you now,” I beg. “I need to feel you, Bucky. Please please please.”

He sets my body down on the bed and smiles at me as he leans over to release each wrist. As soon as he does my hands are in his hair pulling him down on top of me. 

“I have never wanted anyone in my life like I want you. You are so fucking sexy,” I pant to him.

He rewards me by slamming back into me and thrusting hard and fast. My fingers slide down his back and I lick the sweat from his chest. 

“Baby, I’m so close,” he says into my ear. 

I wrap my legs around him and hold onto him for dear life.

The tension is building building building and them I’m calling his name, writhing underneath him. He takes the cue to let go and his hips thrust into me as deeply as he can.

“Fuck, baby, yes,” he cries before collapsing on me.

When he rolls to my side, he turns and gazes at me. “Okay, yes. That was hot as hell. I can definitely do that again.”

I smile and run my thumb over his lips. “I actually bought something else for us.”

He raises his eyebrows. “Oh my.”

I crawl over him and reach into the drawer and pull out a tube. I squeeze some of the contents on my finger and swipe it over my nipples.  
“Edible strawberry-flavored lotion.”

He leans forward and runs his tongue over my breasts until every last bit is gone.

Then he leans back and puts his arms behind his head cockily.

“I approve that purchase heartily. Your turn.”

I bite my lip at him as I smear the lotion across his abs. He’s already getting hard again.

“Oh, one more thing,” he interrupts. “I’m going with you next time you go to this shop.”

He winks and I place my tongue to him.


	5. Surprised Y/N

"Thank you for an incredible night, Bucky.” I cling to his arm as we cross the Brooklyn Bridge.

“Thank YOU, baby. For a wonderful night and indulging me in all my nostalgic trips to Brooklyn.”

“What’s not to love about Brooklyn? Dinner was incredible. We have to go back soon.”

“You sure your feet are alright?”

“I wore flats specifically so we could walk across the bridge tonight, Bucky. I love the view on both sides.”

I stop and lean my back against the rail, pulling him into an embrace. The bridge has a fair number of people passing by but we’re able to find a spot without anyone hanging out in the immediate vicinity. 

“This is a great spot,” Bucky says, tucking my hair behind my ears. Great view of the Manhattan and Brooklyn skylines.”

“My view is better,” I say, dramatically raising my eyebrows and winking at him.

“Hey, that’s supposed to be my line,” he says and leans down to kiss me. It’s sweet and gentle.

“Y/N, I try to tell you all the time, but there are no words that properly convey what you are to me. What you’ve done for me. How much I love and treasure you. You’ve only had a couple years to get to know me, but I’ve had decades of your love, kindness, and beauty. I want to spend the next several decades giving you the kind of love and happiness you’ve always brought me.”

He drops to his knee and reaches into his pocket.

I gasp. “Oh, my God. Bucky. Sweetheart. Holy-”

“Y/N, you are the greatest thing to ever happen to me. Will you do me the honor of marrying me?

I’m shaking. “Yes, of course!” I whisper as the tears slip down my cheeks. He slips the ring on my finger and stands up. I jump up and he embraces me tightly, my legs wrapped around his waist. I start to cry even harder.

“You’re supposed to be happy,” Bucky jokes.

“I AM happy,” I wail and cry harder.

Another couple passes by and looks at us strangely. “We’re getting married!” I sob.

“And she’s very happy about it clearly,” Bucky says and starts laughing.

The passersby keep walking. “New Yorkers,” I snort between sobs.

I start to gather myself. “Okay. Okay. Getting it together now before someone thinks you are trying to toss me off the bridge.”

Bucky gives me another peck on the lips before setting me back on the ground. I start to inspect the ring, a vintage 1920s art deco style.

“Whoa. Wait a minute. I saw this ring when I was out with Wanda four months ago. I told her I loved it.”

“And Wanda kindly passed that information on to me. I went and bought it the same day.”

“You’ve had the ring for four months? You and Wanda have known you were gonna do this for four months?!”

“Well I’ve known I was gonna do this for two years, but yes, Wanda has known for four months. I wanted all my government and legal stuff settled first though. I’d have put it on you as soon as I got home otherwise.”

“It’s beautiful, Bucky. I love you.”

“I love you, too.” He wraps his arm around my waist as we walk the rest of the way to Manhattan.


	6. Emotional Bucky

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This chapter revisits scenes in the original story but with Bucky's feelings and reactions.

Bucky turns to see Steve motioning to him through the glass. He nods and sets the weapon down before walking out, but is surprised to realize Steve isn’t alone, and the person with him isn’t any of the people who are aware he’s hiding here. He feels himself slip into defensive mode as he suspiciously gauges the possible threat. But his heart suddenly feels as if it’s beating out of rhythm, with his stomach flipping, and he feels slightly dizzy as the recognition washes over him. 

“She’s real,” is the thought that his brain keeps chanting over and over again, but his mouth hangs open wordlessly. His angel. The memories of her had started to return in Bucharest, making him ache for her, but at the same time, he doubted she had ever existed at all.

Had she been a figment of his imagination he’d conjured up to cope with the hopeless, empty misery of his life? Had HYDRA implanted her in his brain as a method of control or to enforce compliance? The longer he spent in Romania, filling his notebook and putting together the pieces of his past, the more convinced he had become that she’d never been real. She was too good, too soft, too beautiful.

As he’d strung together his memories of her in his books, he realized she was all over the place, all over his life, unaged and unchanged. He had long ago dismissed the idea that HYDRA would be keeping a woman in cryo for him. It made no sense. He was 90 percent certain she lived only in his mind, one last grasp at sanity.

And now she is standing right in front of him. 

She’s frightened by his question about HYDRA. He sees the fear and confusion in her eyes. Maybe he’s wrong. It’s not her. Bucky senses an oncoming panic attack as Steve rushes her away with a promise to figure things out.

Steve will fix this. Please, Steve, fix this. Bucky sinks to the floor when they’re gone and rests his head on his knees, arms wrapped around his legs.

***

She looks so relieved when he apologizes to her. He can’t stop himself from peeking at her as they walk down the hall, trying to convince his own mind that he’s projecting his false memories onto someone else. She just looks like the girl he imagined. That must be it. And yet he’s drawn to her. She makes him feel safe, a feeling no other human (aside from his imaginary girl) has given him since he fell from the train. It even took him months to fully trust Steve again. He’s overcome with the memory of holding her in his lap, smelling her hair, her gentle voice telling him there was love somewhere in the world and it was waiting for him. 

***

They’re watching TV together again. He surprises himself when he takes the seat next to her, almost as if he was drawn there by a magnet. She gives him a sweet smile and a vision of her standing in front of him flashes in his mind. She steps forward and places her hands gently on his chest, which is battered and bruised from a bloody mission. Her lips begin to press gentle kisses over his rapidly healing cuts while her hands caress his biceps. He abruptly returns to the present when she laughs at the show they are watching. He has moved even closer to her without even realizing it. 

***

Feelings of tremendous guilt wash over him as he sits next to her on the couch. He’s mentally beating himself up for triggering her episode, but she’s insisting he’s not to blame. She turns to look at him and her nose brushes against his. Bucky feels his heart soaring. Kissing her is not a conscious decision, it’s a primal need. He needs her, wants her, craves her. Her lips are on his neck and his hands rub her back in a desperate attempt to signal to his brain that this is real and true. This is not his mind snapping, bending, breaking from merciless torture.

Kissing her is like drinking from a fountain after a long trek through a desert. He presses her between his body and the couch, fighting an overwhelming fear that she’ll inexplicably disappear like she used to. He can’t. He can’t let her go. Not again. It may not make sense, but deep down he knows she’s the woman from his memories. She has to be. Everything about her feels right and he wants this, her, all of it, whether he deserves it or not.

“I’m yours and you are mine,” he hears her say in his memory.

When FRIDAY interrupts, it takes every ounce of control he ever learned in wrangling Steve, being an Army sniper and a trained assassin not to rip the speaker out of the ceiling and smash it into the wall.

***

He doesn’t want her to see him cry. Despite his best efforts the tears slide down his cheeks and his chest aches painfully as he holds in the wracking sobs trying to escape. She cups his face and comforts him. Just as she always has. Because it’s really and truly her. She’s confirmed it. That single ray of light in his life was real all along and somehow he has a second chance.

***

He holds her body tightly to his as he thrusts into her. This is right. This is home. She’s his and he’s hers. He’s not going to wait to tell her he loves her because he knows nothing is promised in this life. Whatever happens, he intends to lay his heart on the table for her tonight.


	7. Sentimental Y/N

I walk into the bedroom and Bucky is standing by my dresser holding old photos in his hands. He glances up at me when I come in, then looks back at the pictures.

“What are you looking at?” I ask as I walk over and put my arms around his waist. He turns the photos around. One is his uniformed enlistment photo and the other is one of him in his blue coat with the Howling Commandos.

“I didn’t know you had these,” he says quietly. “I was looking for your scarf and came across them.”

“Steve said you didn’t seem to want them when he tried to give them to you years ago, so he thought I might like them. And I do. I love them.”

“Yeah, I wasn’t in a great place when he tried to give them to me. They were painful to look at.”

“And now?”

“Fine. It’s fine now.”

I’m not convinced he’s telling the truth, and I'm confused since he has a few photos hanging in our home from his pre-war days. “Are you sure you’re okay? I feel like something is bothering you.”

His eyes meet mine and they look a little sad.

“I wish I could be more like him for you.”

My mouth drops. “What?!”

“I just...I was easier then. Your life would be a lot less complicated with this guy.”

“Oh, Buck, no. I love you now. I love all of you, even your complications. We all have those. And ‘this guy’ is not a separate entity. Steve has told me way too much about him and that’s how I know that all of ‘his’ best qualities survived in YOU.”

The corners of Bucky’s mouth turn up and he sets the photos on top of the dresser so he can return my hug. 

“I love you, baby. I just found the photos and wondered if you wished...I don’t know...for something different.”

“Not even a little a bit. You know why I have those photos? Because your inner goodness isn’t the only thing that survived. Your ability to look incredibly fucking sexy in a uniform remains untouched by time, whether it’s 1942 or today.” I feel Bucky’s chest shake with laughter. “Plus I had to catch you in a more reclusive stage of your life. No way I could have competed with all those dames vying for you in dance halls.”

Bucky curls his index finger under my chin and lifts my head to make eye contact. 

“I would have asked you to dance. Don’t ever doubt that,” he says seriously.

“And I will always say yes. Don’t ever doubt that.”


	8. Overwhelmed Y/N

The hot water courses down my body, washing away my tears. I press my fist to my mouth to cover the sounds of my sobs. The stress and anxiety of the last couple weeks became overwhelming today and I need a release desperately. 

It’s not enough. I’m not doing enough with the gift I’ve been given. I have the ability to affect major change and all I do is wrangle with details. I’ve been an active part of the Avengers for a couple years now, but most of my missions have resembled my first impromptu one, in which I countered bad intel by disabling the explosives at the HYDRA base. Yes, I play an important role, but I’m haunted by the lives I could have saved, bigger changes I could have made. The ones I’m not allowed to do because the team has ruled them too dangerous to the timeline. 

And I know I will always be haunted by the sight of Bucky gliding toward that train. That moment will never leave me no matter how many times Bucky cradles me and says I did what had to be done. 

Bucky’s had a rough couple of weeks. From time to time his PTSD and other issues rear their ugly heads and he struggles before finding his footing on solid ground again. Neither of us has slept well because his nightmares returned a week ago. He even tried to sleep in another room so I could get a decent night’s sleep, but I refused to let him. I know this is temporary and we’ll get through it like before, but today I’m just exhausted.

I brace myself against the wall and gasp for breath, chest anguished from trying to remain quiet. The shower door opens behind me.

“Baby, what’s wrong?”

Fucking super soldier hearing.

“Nothing,” I force out, turning my face to the brunt of the spray so he won’t see my red-rimmed eyes.

“I can hear you crying, babygirl. Please tell me what I can do.”

“Nothing. I’m okay. It’s just one of those days. Really. I’m tired and overwhelmed, but it will be okay.”

His arms suddenly wrap around me and he presses his body against my back. He pulls me tightly against him. 

“Bucky, your clothes!” 

He’s completely dressed in now sopping wet sweatpants, socks and a t-shirt.

He turns me around and pulls me back into him, rocking me beneath the spray of water. I press my face against the wet material of his shirt that’s clinging to his chest. 

We don’t talk as he lathers my hair and rinses away the shampoo. Or when I rub the body wash all over his chest after he tosses his clothes over the door to create a pool on the tile floor. He wraps me in a fluffy towel and puts one around his waist. I stand by the bed as he uses the towel to dry my hair. Then he pulls one of his shirts over my head. He throws on some boxers and sits back against the headboard, pulling me into his lap. I rest my head on his shoulder as he runs his fingers carefully through my damp hair.

“Bucky, I’m sorry. I know you’re having a rough time and you don’t have--”

“No.” he interrupts me. “Please let me be here for you. Please. You’ve given me so much. I need to know that you trust me to be here for you when you are the one who is hurting.”

For once in my life, I know not to argue. I can hear in his voice how much he needs to know that this an equal partnership in which his love and comfort is as essential as mine.

“I trust you completely.”


	9. Y/N with a stomach bug

I can’t stop looking at the clock no matter how hard I try to distract myself. I’ve cleaned our suite from top to bottom, tried and failed to read my novel, and made Bucky welcome home brownies. It’s more than my usual anxiousness for Bucky to return from a mission.

Finally, FRIDAY gives me word that they’ve landed. I rush down toward the entrance and arrive as the team loudly storms through the door. Sometimes it’s hard to imagine them in stealth mode with the way they carry on. Sam’s teasing Steve about some sort of goofy-looking spin he did during a fight and Natasha and Tony are arguing about the comms. Clint and Bucky are having a conversation, but as soon as Bucky sees me, he breaks away from the group and lifts me off the floor in a hug. 

“You never hug ME like that!” yells Sam. 

“Which one of us are you talking to?” I wink at him.

“Well I know who I’d rather get a hug from-”

“Back off,” Bucky says with a joking scowl. “She’s taken. I, however, am not opposed to wrapping my left arm around your neck in a friendly greeting if you like.”

“I made you brownies,” I tell him, nuzzling into his hair.

“You are the best. One more power bar and I’m going to lose it.”

Bucky walks ahead of the group carrying me down the hall. Since I’m facing the group I can see them making kissy gestures at us. I feel my face turn red, so I give them both of my middle fingers.

“You tell them, baby,” Bucky chuckles.

When we reach the suite, the door opens automatically. Bucky walks into the kitchen and places me on the counter. He turns to wash his hands, then immediately goes for the brownies. He’ll probably polish them off before we even go to bed. He breaks the first one in half and hands it to me. Then he stands at the counter between my legs and kisses me before biting into it. 

He swallows a bite and says, “Damn, I missed you.”

I swallow what’s in my mouth, and give him a peck on the forehead. “I missed you, too, gorgeous. Four days felt like four months.”

“Are you feeling better? I felt horrible leaving you here when you had a stomach bug.”

“I’m good, sweetheart. Really good. Bruce checked me out.”

“So back to normal now?”

“Define normal.” I stroke his cheek and smile at him.

“Not throwing up anymore?”

“No, I’m still doing that at random times of the day.”

“What? Why?” Bucky’s forehead wrinkles in concern. 

I take the brownie out of his hand and set it on the plate. I grab both his hands and place them on my stomach, leaning forward to kiss him softly on the lips.

“We made a baby, sweetheart.”

Bucky’s mouth drops and his eyes jump back and forth between my face and his hands on my stomach. He tries to say something but literally can’t get any words out, so he lifts my shirt and rubs my bare belly. 

His lower lip trembles and he finally forces out a whisper. “Are you sure? I didn’t think that I- You’re sure?”

“Bruce confirmed it.” I put my hands on the back of his head and pull his face to mine. “You’re going to be a daddy.”

I hop down and lead him to the couch. I lie back against a throw pillow and he lays his head on my stomach and strokes it gently.

“The odds were so low,” Bucky says. “I can’t believe this is real.”

My heart swells with emotion looking at his dark head kissing and rubbing my stomach. With everything HYDRA had done to him and the repeated periods in cryo, it was not likely we would be able to have children but somehow Bucky has beaten HYDRA once again.

***

I wake in the middle of the night to the same nausea I’ve been experiencing off and on for days now. I carefully extricate myself from Bucky’s arms and rush to the bathroom. I vomit violently into the toilet then fall back against the wall. Bucky rushes in and kneels next to me, reaching up for a hand towel to wipe my mouth.

“Real sexy, huh?” I snort.

“You are always beautiful. Even hugging a toilet,” Bucky says as he tucks my hair behind me ear. “Want to get back in bed?”

“No, I’ve developed a pretty standard routine. This is going to go on for a while. I’ve actually been sleeping in here part of the night the last few nights...and sometimes part of the day. It’s great.” I give a pained smile then lurch forward to throw up again. Bucky rubs my back as I heave. 

I sit back and grab the large towel hanging off the counter. I start to spread it on the floor so I can lie down. 

“You’ve been sleeping on this hard floor with only a towel under you?” Bucky gasps.

“It’s fine, sweetheart. It really is easier than running from the bed over and over.”

Bucky bites his lip and looks around. “I’ll be right back.”

He’s gone for at least 10 minutes, during which I vomit again. When he returns he’s hauling an oversized bean bag made for two people and extra blankets.

“Where in the world did that come from?” 

“It’s Sam’s. He said we could use it.”

“Did he find it strange you would want his bean bag at 1 in the morning?”

“Extremely, but I said it was for you and that you didn’t feel well.”

Bucky picks me up and cradles me while he pushes the beanbag in front of the toilet with his foot. Then he supports me with his vibranium arm while he spreads the blanket with the other. After he sets me on it, he snuggles behind me and pulls a blanket over us.

“Oh, sweetie, you’re the best for this but you don’t have to stay and watch.”

“I’ll leave if it embarrasses you, but otherwise I want to help. You’re carrying my- our baby. This is part of that.” His hand is rubbing my back and I have to admit it feels amazing.

A couple hours later I feel well enough to move back to the bed. I doze off briefly but wake to realize Bucky is watching me sleep with his hand resting on my stomach. 

“Can we tell everybody tomorrow?” He looks like a kid on Christmas morning.

I giggle at his enthusiasm. “It’s early...but yes. It’s not like I’ll be able to hide it, vomiting on Tony's Italian shoes, so let’s go ahead and do it."

He scoots over nestles against me. “I can’t wait to tell Steve he’s going to be an uncle. Also, we need to make more brownies. He's gonna be mad I didn't save him any.”


	10. Grandparents

“What time is Ethan supposed to be here?”

I check my watch. “Any minute.”

Bucky lifts a lid on the stove and sniffs. “Smells good, gorgeous.”

The doorbell rings and I start to walk toward it, but Bucky’s long legs beat me by a mile. He pulls the door open and a little girl with a tiara shrieks, “Grandpa!”

“Leah!” Bucky calls happily and swoops the little girl up effortlessly.

“Hi, honey,” I say embracing Ethan and his husband Jeff. 

Bucky sets Leah on the ground and she runs off to find our cat Fatty. He exchanges hugs with the boys as well. 

“Dad, you’re getting a little more gray up there,” Ethan jokes.

“Hey!” I warn. “Don’t go there.”

“Oh Mom, your colorist is killing it as usual. You look amazing.”

“How was the drive?” Bucky asks, leading everyone to the kitchen where the boys take drinks at the counter and Bucky helps me putter around the kitchen putting the final touches on everything.  
“Not bad. Getting out of Boston was rough though. Is Uncle Steve joining us tonight?”

“No, Peggy’s movers fell through, so of course the old man is over there moving her furniture to her new apartment by himself.” Bucky rolls his eyes. “The things we do for our kids.”

“Daddy, Dad!” Leah shrieks from the back of the house. “Fatty, stole my bracelet and took it behind the couch!”

The boys hop up to make sure Leah isn’t torturing poor Fatty to death.

Bucky comes up behind me as I’m stirring the sauce and wraps his arms around me, swaying me, a kitchen habit he’s maintained since we first got together. He brushes my hair to the side and kisses my neck.

“I wish Rebecca could have been here tonight. We don’t get the whole family together enough these days,” he says in my ear.

I lean back and peck his cheek. “She will definitely be here for the holidays, sweetie. Don’t worry.”

After dinner we all relax out on the deck. Leah bounces on Bucky’s lap and rubs his metal arm affectionately like she always does. She adores it. Once the boys found her surrounded by aluminum foil all over the floor in the kitchen trying to wrap her arm in the stuff to look like Grandpa. 

She jumps down and says, “Grandpa, come find me!”

“You’re lucky I love you so much or I’d be jealous she gives you all the attention,” I say with a wink.

“Kids just like shiny objects,” he quips at me before wandering into the yard to pretend to search for her. She always chooses the same three spots so it’s more a game of dramatic peeking behind trees and objects. It’s adorable to watch Bucky pretend like her muffled giggling isn’t a beacon to his super soldier hearing. 

“Dad looks good,” Ethan says to me when Bucky seems distracted enough not to be listening to our conversation.

Jeff nods. “So do you. How is the rest of the team?”

“We’re all doing alright,” I reply softly. “Tony’s passing was tough on all of us, but he was able to do it peacefully at home with Pepper and the family so that’s good. It’s a better way to go than in the field. He fought giving up the mantle of Iron Man so long, we thought it was a given he’d die fighting. Your Dad is doing better though. They always had a complicated relationship, but it was really good for the last several years and I think that gives him a lot of peace.”

“Got you!” Bucky yells playfully and we hear Leah shriek with joy.

“Leah, it’s time for bed,” Jeff says.

“I want Grandpa to take me,” Leah says emphatically.

“That’s up to Grandpa.”

“I’ve got it,” Bucky says throwing her over his shoulder and tickling her.

We hear them head up the stairs with shrieks of “Grandpa, stop it!” followed by “Do it again!”

Eventually the rest of us head inside. I’m tired and decide the kitchen can be cleaned tomorrow. Bucky never came back down. When I get to the top of the stairs, the boys are standing in the doorway of Leah’s room. Bucky is passed out next to Leah, who apparently insisted he stay until she fell asleep. Her little arm is tossed over his chest and his arm is wrapped around her as he snores gently.

I walk over to wake him. I look at his face next to hers, her smooth, young, soft skin, compared to his lined forehead and creases by his eyes that I find so dramatically gorgeous when he smiles. But despite some more wrinkles and some grays, he is still very much the breathtaking man I fell in love with. I’ve noticed lately that I’m aging slightly faster than him, even though I’m a little younger, likely due to the super soldier serum. Steve is the same way, much to his wife Annie’s shared chagrin.

Rather than wake him, I lean over to give him a peck on the lips. I’ll let him stay for now. But his eyes pop open when our lips meet. 

“My other beautiful girl,” he says as he carefully sits up, turning to cover Leah.

He grabs my hand and follows me to our bedroom. He finishes his bedtime routine before I do and crawls into bed, where he waits for me to join him. When I climb in he leans over to kiss me. “Night, baby.”

Our door bursts open. “Why you leave, Grandpa! I sleep with you guys!” Leah hurls herself into the bed and crawls under the blanket between us. 

Bucky puts his arm over her and reaches over to brush my cheek. “Good night to my beauties,” he says.

I fall asleep with my hand in his hair.


	11. Y/N's Bad Mission

It’s a relatively simple mission. Go to a HYDRA base to gather some intel that has since been destroyed, but will help with planning future missions. The team always researches these jobs to a T so I know exactly where and when to send myself with the fewest people around. Bucky’s also been training me on weapons and Natasha on physical combat. I do okay, but I’ll probably never be sent into an actual combat mission. I’m okay with that, and Bucky is ecstatic. If I encounter trouble, my instructions are always to just disappear. 

When I see the security patrol pass by, I step through the door and then fully materialize. I glance around the room and see no one, so I head over to the computer and begin to follow the carefully laid out instructions on the paper in my pocket. I don’t hear a smaller door open to my left, a door that leads to a small storage room that was added on later and didn’t appear on the plans of the base we obtained. Nor do I hear the stealthy footsteps behind me. I’m aware of nothing until the arm locks around my throat yanking me backward. 

It’s fast. Too fast to process what’s happening and get out. The man spins me around, and grabs my throat again, while I struggle for breath. I reach for my string, to pull myself home, but I’ve never tried to do this while fighting for oxygen. It’s hard to focus. There’s a sharp pain in my side and he steps back. I look down and see the blood, then up to see the guard brandishing a knife. I realize he looks young, very young, and in shock. It’s as if I’m the first person he’s ever tried to kill. He’s so young I think I might just be.

He’s yelling at me in Russian, and he grabs me by the hair dragging me out of the room and into the hall. A trail of blood is left in my wake. I’m woozy, but I know if I don’t get myself home immediately, I will probably never get home at all. I can’t leave Bucky and baby Ethan like this. I fight for consciousness but pass out instead.

When I wake up I’m being tied to a cot in a cell. I pretend I’m still out as they secure the knots and someone places a flimsy bandage over my stab wound. One of the men starts to tear my shirt open, buttons flying but another man yells at him and pushes him off me. I keep my eyes closed the whole time and focus on returning home. I had no idea how hard it would be to do this while injured and it’s taking every ounce of my energy, of which I don’t have much.

“She’s back,” I hear faintly, followed by gasps of horror. I don’t even have it in me to open my eyes.

“Oh my God,” I think I hear Tony say. I feel hands at my shirt, pulling it up to show the wound. 

“Baby, oh Jesus, what happened. Fuck fuck fuck. Baby, please open your eyes.” I’m lifted into the air and pressed against a warm, firm body. I feel a slight jostle as the person carrying me begins to run. 

“Tell Cho and the others to get ready!” Tony yells in the distance.

“I’ve got you, baby,” I hear in my ear. “You’re okay. Everything is going to be okay. Hang on for me.”

“Bu-- Bu-- “ I sputter.

“Shhhh shhhhh. I have you. Save your energy.” I pass out.

***

I wake in a hospital bed, groggy and sore, but at least I’m able to open my eyes. Slowly I turn my head. Bucky is sitting in a chair next to me, forehead resting on the mattress, cradling my hand.

“Bucky,” I croak.

His head pops up immediately, eyes red and swollen. He immediately stands and leans over to cradle my face carefully, pressing his forehead to mine. “Oh doll,” he gasps out as he fights more tears from spilling out. 

“Am I- Am I going to be okay?” I whisper.

“Yes, baby, Cho operated and fixed you up. She doesn’t think there will be any lasting damage. But you did lose a lot of blood.”

I try to sit up and groan. 

“No, don’t move. You need to heal.” Bucky hits a button to alert staff I’m awake.

After the staff checks on me, the rest of the team files in a few at a time for quick hellos and to see how I’m doing. 

“Don’t scare us like that, kiddo,” Sam jokes but without his usual enthusiasm. 

I fill Tony, Steve and Bucky in on what went wrong. Bucky stares at the floor looking devastated, as he holds my hand with both of his. 

Tony rubs his face. “Fuck,” he finally snaps. “I’m so fucking sorry, Y/N.”

“It’s nobody’s fault. The room wasn’t on our plans. I wasn’t paying close enough attention either. And now we know being injured severely compromises my abilities.”

“I need to run to the bathroom,” Bucky says quietly. “I’ll be right back, baby.” He doesn’t look up when he says any of this and I know he’s trying to avoid losing it in front of the team.

I look at Tony and Steve when he leaves. “I’m sorry, guys.”

“You take a knife in the gut and apologize? Stop it.” Tony replies. “We’re sorry. And in light of this new information we’ll all sit down and discuss how to keep you safe in the future as soon as you’re better.” He pats my hand and gives me a peck on the cheek. “Rest up now.”

Steve remains by my side.

“Some asset I am,” I say, pain starting to make me feel cranky.

“Don’t say that. You’ve done amazing things on this team.”

The nurse comes back in at this point. “We need to let her rest,” she says. 

“It hurts,” I mutter.

“I can give you something for that,” she says, fumbling with my IV.

Bucky returns and his eyes are even redder and looking bloodshot. Steve embraces him and whispers in his ear.

“Get some sleep, Y/N,” he says before leaving.

The nurse turns to Bucky as if she’s going to tell him to leave. I spare her his murder face by immediately saying, “I need him here. He can’t go.”

She nods and leaves. “Push the button if you need anything else.”

I start to scoot over, groaning.

“Stop moving, baby!” Bucky panics.

“Making room. Get up here.”

“But-”

“Need you. Get in here with me.”

With extreme caution, Bucky pulls the blanket back and climbs in. He makes sure he’s not interfering with any wires. He cuddles up to me, careful to avoid touching my injury.

I feel myself drifting off. “Stay with me,” I say softly. He says something back but it’s lost to me as I sink into unconsciousness.


	12. Honeymoon

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Smut smut smut. Nothing but. Thanks for the inspiration, Seb, with all your Greece and TIFF photos lately. And then you had to top it off by blowing me a kiss on Instagram today.

I’m standing on the balcony of the secluded cliff house on Mykonos overlooking a blue-green sea. It truly might be the most beautiful place I’ve ever seen.

Hands come to rest on my hips, thumbs making small circles. Bucky leans down to kiss my neck, his lips grazing from my earlobe to my shoulder. “Gorgeous,” he says.

“Isn’t it?” I exclaim. 

“I didn’t mean the ocean,” he says as he moves to the other side of my neck.

I lean back against him and reach one hand to the back of his head, threading his hair in my fingers. His hands move from my hips to my stomach and up over my breasts. I moan softly.

“You’re my wife,” he says softly. His hands move back to my hips and he pulls me against him tightly so I can feel how hard that thought makes him.

His hands move back to my shoulders where he slips the straps of my summer dress over my shoulders. One side slips down enough to reveal my breast and his flesh hand is stroking it, then circling my nipple. My head falls against his chest and my breathing speeds up.

“I want to touch you everywhere.”

“Please,” I murmur.

The other strap slips down and the vibranium hand matches the movements of the flesh one. Then he pushes the dress down enough for gravity to complete the job of it pooling around my feet. I’m left in my lacy black strapless bra and panties. Bucky spins me around and captures my lips in a kiss, then proceeds to move lower and lower until he’s on his knees kissing and licking at my stomach. He looks up at me as he does this, so I reach back and unclasp my bra, letting it fall to the floor. He slides my panties down and leans back to take me in.

“Mine,” he whispers. 

“All yours,” I say as I reach out and run my fingertips down the side of his face. He springs up and wraps his arms around me. The feel of my completely naked body pressed against his fully clothed one is erotic, but it doesn’t last long. He reaches back to pull his shirt over his head with his fist. My fingers fumble with his pants zipper and I push them down along with his boxers. His cock springs free and I immediately spin him so he’s the one leaning on the railing and drop to my knees. My tongue circles the tip, then I take him in as far as I can. He moans and arches back against the railing. My head bobs with my tongue pressed to the underside of his shaft, my hands rubbing up and down his thighs. 

“Babygirl, oh fuck,” he moans. I cup his balls and gently massage him. “Stop, baby, I don’t want to come yet.”

I release him and place little kitten licks along his v-line. He reaches down and grabs my upper arms to haul me up. His hands slide down my back and over my ass. They slide down to my thighs and he lifts me so my legs wrap around his waist. His tongue parts my lips and explores my mouth as he carries me over to the cushioned lounge chair to lay me down. He locks his arms around my thighs and pulls me to the edge of the chair, where I feel his tongue gently glide over my slit. Then it slips between my lips as he places my legs over his shoulders. Moaning and writhing I can barely contain myself under the warm Greek sun. His tongue moves against my clit and I look down to see his eyes dancing at me overcome with pleasure.

“Bucky…” I sigh, locking eyes with him. His tongue moves faster and I’m soon falling over the edge, screaming his name. His stands and hovers over me. I reach up for him, desperate to run my hands over every inch of his hard, taut body. He pumps himself a couple times and groans. 

“Being married to you makes me so fucking hard,” he says as he eases himself between my legs.

“Please Bucky. I want you inside me.”

He grants my wish, grabbing my hands and holding them down above my head. His hips piston into me and I gasp at every thrust. I look directly into his eyes as I push my hips upward to meet him.

“I- oh oh- I love you, Bucky,” I gasp out. His thrusts slow as he presses his forehead to mine and looks back at me intensely. 

“I love you too, doll. So much.” In one swift motion he releases my hands and rolls us over so I’m on top of him. His view is of me with the wall of a steep cliff behind me and a bright blue sky. 

“So beautiful,” he gets out before tossing his head back in pleasure. His hands slide over my breasts down to my hips. Then he pushes himself up into sitting wrapping his arms around me. We match each other thrust for thrust with his face nuzzled in my neck and my chin on top of his head. 

His breathing is becoming erratic and I know he’s nearing orgasm. I tug at his hair, his weakness and feel him release inside me. His groans trigger my own release and I collapse on top of him when he lays back on the chair. His hands smooth up and down my back as we get our breath back. I feel the warm sun on my back and hear the beating of my new husband’s heart underneath me. Feelings of warmth and happiness fill me. This is a far cry from the damp, dark dungeon in which we spent so many hours together.

“Look where we are, baby,” he says softly as if reading my thoughts.

I lift my head and smile at him, then press kisses all over his face.


	13. Bucky's First Parent/Teacher Conference

Bucky follows Y/N down the hall nervously. It’s not as if he’s never been in the school before, but this is the first time his schedule has allowed him to attend parent/teacher conferences. He sees Y/N try to hide a smile after glancing at him.

“Something funny?” he says, nudging her with his hip.

“Yes, you,” she replies in a low voice. “My sexy hero Avenger husband is nervous about a parent/teacher conference. It’s charming.”

“I’ve never done one of these before! What if I say the wrong thing? Or she thinks I’m a bad parent?” Bucky is joking, but only partially.

Y/N takes his hand. “It will be fine. You’re a great dad.”

She taps on the classroom door and Ethan’s teacher waves them in. She’s young and attractive, only in her third year of teaching. She does a blatant double take at the sight of Bucky. At first Bucky feels embarrassed because he thinks she’s judging him for not having been in before, but he soon realizes she’s staring at him for other reasons.

“It’s so nice to meet you, Mr. Barnes. What an honor to have an Avenger in my classroom! I’m MISS Buckley”

She smooths her hair back and adjusts her skirt before sitting back down at the conference table. Her eyes keep darting back to him. 

“And Mrs. Barnes, great to see you again!” This appears to be an afterthought. 

Bucky can see Y/N stifling laughter. 

“Please have a seat.”

Y/N sits down daintily with no problem, but Bucky practically falls on his ass trying to sit in the small chair. He looks huge and ridiculous in it. Y/N is chewing her lip to hold in her snorts. He’s gonna get her for this.

“I’m really enjoying having Ethan in my first grade class.” Miss Buckley proceeds to go over his academics. Bucky has to give her credit. She’s trying desperately to divide her glances between him and Y/N, but she can’t seem to help looking at him most of the time. 

Bucky shifts in the chair and almost falls off again. Y/N guffaws and turns it into a cough.

“So, yes, Ethan is right on track and even ahead in some areas, especially science.”

Bucky gets a huge smile at this.

“I do have concerns about his behavior though.”

Bucky cocks his head in confusion. “Is he giving you attitude? Not following directions?”

“Oh, no. No attitude. Sometimes I do need to ask him to do things multiple times, but he’s not defiant. He’s just too social. Very talkative.”

Y/N’s phone dings at that moment. She reaches to turn the sound off, but when she sees who the message is from, she says, “I’m so sorry. I would never ordinarily do this, but it’s work. Since Bucky is here, I’m going to step out for a moment.”

Bucky feels a brief moment of panic as Y/N walks out. “Get it together, Barnes. You fight terrorists and murderers. You can handle a first grade teacher,” he thinks to himself.

“So as I was saying, he’s quite popular with his peers, but it can be a bit distracting to his work. The girls just love him. I imagine he gets that from you,” she says, cocking her head at him and smiling.

Bucky’s eyes dart to the door. No Y/N. “Ummmm...I don’t…”

“Please don’t misunderstand me. He’s a delight to have in my class. Gosh, you know, I bet he would love it if you could come in and meet the class. Maybe talk to them about what you do!”  
“You want me to talk to a room full of first graders?” Bucky asks, confused.

“I think it would be very motivating.” 

“Oh God, she's flirting with me,” Bucky thinks. “Parents will love having a former brainwashed assassin at Career Day.”

She’s still looking at him expectantly when Y/N walks in. “Sorry about that. I told Tony not to bother me with petty stuff. Now, did I hear something about Bucky coming in to talk to the class?” Y/N turns to give Bucky a sly look. “That would be soooo FUN.”

Bucky shifts uncomfortably and there’s a slight crack from under him. He jumps up and the plastic seat has split partially down the middle. He turns red.

Bucky narrows his eyes and gives Y/N a dirty look before Miss Buckley turns back to him.

“Oh don’t worry about it. That happens all the time,” Miss Buckley insists.

“Super Soldiers crack your chairs all the time?” Y/N laughs.

“Well, uh, not exactly-”

“So yeah, I’ll just set up a time later to talk to the class,” Bucky interrupts. “Just, um, send me an email with the details...or whatever.”

“I will do that. Thank you so much for both of you coming in.”

Neither of them talk until they are in the parking lot. As soon as they walk through the double doors, Y/N bursts into laughter. 

“You broke a chair!” she wails hysterically.

Bucky wraps his arm around her neck and pulls her into his side. “I’m going to get you for today.”

Y/N giggles. “You were so red. It was adorable.”

“Miss Buckley was, um...interesting,” Bucky says, shaking his head.

“Funny. Last time I met her she was MS. Buckley, you stud. Oh look, you’re turning red again.”

“That chair seriously made my ass hurt.”  
“Your ass seriously made that chair hurt.”

“That’s enough out of you. Get in the car, doll.” He opens her door and she climbs in; then he walks around to his side. When he opens his door, Y/N pats the driver’s seat and says to it, “Don’t worry. You’re gonna be okay.”

“You are spending way too much time with Sam,” Bucky says rolling his eyes. “But I love you anyway.”


	14. Father's Day

“Daddy!” Rebecca’s voice is piercing.

Ethan pushes the bedroom door open and Rebecca follows with a tray. The orange juice teeters precariously and I reach over her head to grab the glass.

Bucky sits up sleepily and rubs his face.

“Happy Father’s Day!” Rebecca shrieks in her ear-piercing voice.

“Honey, let’s wake Daddy up a little more quietly.”

“Happy Father’s Day,” Ethan shouts as he jumps on the bed and starts to bounce. I shake my head and Bucky laughs. He grabs Ethan in a a hug and then sets him on the bed next to him.

Rebecca puts the tray on the bedside table and leaps at Bucky. He grabs her in midair and pulls her in for a hug.

“We made you breakfast, Daddy. I did the toast.” She reaches over for a piece of slightly burned bread and pushes it at him.

“Thank you, Becca and Ethan and Mommy,” he says, winking at me and taking a huge bite out of the toast.

“Don’t forget the jelly,” I say winking back at him. He smiles seductively, remembering the week prior when some of that same jelly had dripped off my bread and he licked it off my chest before heading off to work.

Becca whips out the card she made him. Glitter flutters all over the sheets and I clap my hand to face in exasperation. Glitter is the herpes of the art world. 

“I have the best family,” Bucky exclaims. “Thanks, kiddos. Come here, Mama. Join us.”

I climb into the bed with them. Rebecca keeps handing him stuff on the tray and Bucky shovels it down as quickly as she hands it to him. 

“Dad, you can have the best seat on the couch for cartoons today.” Ethan is quite proud of his sacrifice. It’s clear on his face.

“Thanks, Buddy,” Bucky says as he gives him a high five. 

The kids eventually tire of watching Bucky eat and head to the living room to prepare the blanket fort for television watching with Dad. I crawl in next to him and lean my head on his shoulder. Bucky reaches over with his finger and smears jelly on my neck.

“Hey!”

He smirks then leans over and licks it off. “Tastes better on you than bread.”

He pulls me against his chest. “Thank you, baby.”

“This was all their idea, actually. Beck has been planning it all week. She spent two straight days obsessing on how to cook the eggs and whether you’d want pancakes or waffles. I was gonna wake you with something else, but that can wait.” I growl and nip at his ear. 

“Mmmmm. Can’t wait for my dessert.”

“Daddy! The fort is ready!”

“Ah yes. And Ethan found something special for your Father’s Day fort.”

I jump up and pull Bucky to the living room, where he’s greeted by the kid’s construction using the latest in Avenger merchandise. Bucky’s face in full Avenger uniform is printed on the blanket. 

“Holy crap. What is this?”

“You got your own blanket, baby. You no longer have to share merchandise space with Sam and Tony.”

“Well this really is the best Father’s Day ever!” 

He charges after the kids who squeal and throw themselves into the fort.

“You don’t know the password! You can’t get us!” screams Rebecca.

I go to the kitchen to pour myself another coffee. Happy shrieks and wails await my return.


	15. Rebecca's Date

“Don’t scare him too badly, Bucky.”

“Who? Me? What do you mean?”

“Bucky, Becca really likes this guy. Don’t freak him out when he gets here.”

“I really don’t know what you’re talking about.”

***  
The doorbell rings a couple hours later and I make my way to the door. Bucky beats me there. He opens the door, positioning his body to fill the doorframe. I roll my eyes. I knew he’d pull this crap.

“You must be Neil,” Bucky says, turning his body to allow Neil to walk in. 

“Yes, Mr- um, Sergeant? Barnes? It’s nice to meet you.”

Bucky reaches for a handshake, and squeezes just enough to intimidate but not injure. Bucky is also doing an amazing job of making himself seem significantly taller than the teenage boy, even though, in reality, he only has maybe three extra inches. 

“Neil, welcome to our house. Becca will be down in a minute. Why don’t we have a seat in the living room?” I lead him to a chair. 

Bucky sits across from him and proceeds to not blink for a disturbing amount of time. I’m torn between laughing and kicking him in the ankle.

“So Neil. you play baseball?” Bucky asks.

“Yes, sir,” Neil tries to make eye contact, but Bucky’s unblinking status is clearly making him nervous. 

They proceed to talk game stats for a few minutes and I make a point of smiling and looking friendly to balance out Bucky’s intimidation tactics.

Becca comes down and Bucky does a double take at her dress. It’s not overly revealing, but a little sexier than anything he’s seen her in before. He looks at me like he wants me to intervene. I shake my head. I approved the dress already. There’s nothing wrong with it other than Bucky wanting Becca to wear Gymboree or potato sacks for all of eternity.

“Ready to go, Neil?” Becca asks.

Bucky stands up and projects his not so resting murder face. “You kids have a good time. Becca, your curfew is 12. Don’t forget again.”

He turns to Neil and lifts his shoulders into an intimidating stature. “Neil, you have a good time tonight, but be careful. Don’t want to have the Avengers out looking for you if-”

“Oh, Daddy, knock it off.” Becca grabs Neil’s hand and pulls him out the door. I snort and Bucky glares at me. We wave goodbye as they back out of the driveway.

Bucky stares wistfully after them as they disappear from sight. 

“It’s not 1940, Buck. You need to chill.”

“I know what I was like at that age and that was a very different, far more conservative time. And where did that dress come from?”

“The store where I paid for it.”

He wrinkles his nose at me. “She’s my little girl.”

“Not so little anymore, babe.”

He shrugs with a hint of sadness. “Always my little girl.”

I wrap my arms around him and look up at his stubbled, handsome face. I peck a gray spot on his cheek with my lips. 

“Wanna see the dress I bought for me?”

“Hell yes.”


	16. Bucky's Third Mission

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Two posts today. A little angsty...

I’m pacing frantically waiting for the quinjet to arrive. Steve called ahead to ask me to be at the hangar for Bucky because the mission didn’t go smoothly and he’s not taking it well. It’s only the third mission he’s been on since being cleared by the government. I’d wanted him to wait longer to fully join the team, but he was anxious to give back after all his years with HYDRA.

The team begins to walk off the jet, but there’s no sign of Bucky or Steve. Sam nods at me and gestures behind him. I climb onto the jet and see Bucky sitting in his seat staring straight ahead. Steve is sitting next to him with his hand on his shoulder. I muffle a gasp when I see dried blood all over Bucky’s face and soaking through his shirt.

“It’s not all his,” Steve says quietly in my ear to reassure me. 

I get on my knees in front of him and take both his hands in mine. 

“Hey, Sweetie. You okay?”

He chews his bottom lip and knits his eyebrows together like he’s confused. His eyes slowly lift from his lap to my face and I stroke his cheek. He looks so sad that I feel my heart twist in my chest.

“Come with me, Buck. Let’s go inside.”

He finally stands and walks off the jet between us. My hand rubs his lower back as we walk to the clinic. One of the nurses walks over to take a look at him, but he jerks away.

“No.”

“Baby, let’s make sure you are okay.”

“I don’t need medical attention.”

“Bucky, just let her-”

“No, Steve,” he snaps.

“Come with me then,” I say softly and lead him into an examining room, shutting the door behind me. “It’s just us, Bucky.”

I urge him to sit on the table and help him pull his shirt over his head. He’s covered in cuts and shallow stab wounds. For him and the serum, they are insignificant. For me, they are like a punch to the gut. 

Rather than force him to talk, I begin to gently wipe the blood from his face. One cut on his forehead is a little deeper than the others so I place a bandage over it. I kiss his forehead and the tip of his nose and see his shoulders relax slightly. 

Then I start to clean his chest and back. He seems to revel in my touch, even closing his eyes as he begins to untense. I place bandages on three of his deeper cuts. My head is tipped downward as I apply them and I feel him kiss the back of my head. I lean in to hold him, but still say nothing. I just run my hands up down his backside. After a few minutes I feel his arms around me. 

“They killed them,” he whispers.

“Who, baby?”

“The kids. They were experimenting on kids. There were bodies that-”

He chokes up and stops talking. “Oh, honey,” I say.

“We saved the ones that were still alive, but some of them… They’d been doing this for a while. And I know what they went through. But they were only kids.”

“I’m so sorry, my love. I’m so so sorry.”

“They were still there. The doctors, you know? The scientists who were doing tests on them.”

He hesitates and I wait patiently.

“I killed all of them. Every single one.”

I nod against his chest. “They were monsters. You did what had to be done.”

“I just want to sleep now. Can we go to our suite?”

“Of course,” I say as I toss a gown over his shoulders to cover his injuries for our walk back. His shirt is done for. I put one arm around him and carry his bag with the rest of his uniform in my other hand.

We pass Tony in the hall. “You did good today, Barnes,” he says in a rare moment of solemness. Bucky nods slightly and I give Tony a sad smile.

“He found the kids, you know. Figured out where they were being kept,” Tony says to me. “He saved a lot of lives today.”

I give Tony a smile of thanks and walk Bucky the rest of the way to our room where I put him to bed.


	17. Cockblockers

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have two more chapters written that are intended to close out these one shots. But since I'm having trouble saying goodbye, I thought I'd see if any of you have requests for a particular scene you'd like to see from their lives first. If my creativity allows, I will do my best :)
> 
> Thanks for the comments so far, especially my regulars!

Bucky stirs, unsure of what woke him. It’s early in the morning, light just starting to filter through the curtains. Y/N is sleeping with her back to him, face buried in her pillow. Bucky sits up and stretches as he listens to her gentle breathing. He doesn’t want to wake her but he can’t resist the desire to get closer, so he cautiously edges his body over to spoon her. She sighs and presses her back against his body. Bucky props his head on his hand and looks down at her as she looks back at him.

“Morning, baby,” Bucky says tenderly.

“Mmmmm.” Y/N turns toward him and snuggles into his chest. Bucky strokes her hair and then his fingertips dance over her shoulder. He feels himself getting hard though that wasn’t his intention to start with. Sometimes he still can’t believe the effect she has on him.

Y/N wraps her arm around him and presses closer to him, accidentally brushing against his erection.

“Oh, hey now,” she murmurs.

“Sorry, baby. It started out innocent enough.”

“Don’t be sorry.” Her fingers start to play across his back. Then she sits up and pulls his shirt she’s sleeping in over her head and tosses it to the floor. She lies back down in just her panties. Bucky’s fingers start at her shoulders, then move painfully slow over her breast and to her stomach. They pause at the scar on her abdomen, a reminder of the time he almost lost her. His lips trace the scar tissue lovingly. Then he kicks off his boxer briefs before he returns his attentions to her body. He slides her blue panties down her legs as she smiles softly at him. Bucky moans as she spreads herself wide.

He climbs over her and positions himself at her entrance, but pauses to take in her sweet face, soft lips, and kind eyes. She has just a hint of lines at the edges of her eyes now, only visible close up, slightly more noticeable when she smiles at him, like she is now. She’s more beautiful than ever, he thinks.

He pushes into her warmth slowly and she makes the sweet sounds he loves so much. Her arms and legs wrap around him, something she knows he craves. It makes him feel possessed by her, the only person he’s every welcomed such a feeling from. His thrusts are slow and soft. He’s not in a hurry this morning.

“You feel so good, Bucky,” she says softly. He swivels his hips in response.

The door flies open. “Daddy! Mommy! I had a bad dream!”

Bucky pulls out of Y/N quickly as she gasps in shock. He pulls the blanket to cover his wife and spins around to face Rebecca making sure he’s covered as well, while using his body to block her view of her mother. 

Becca has tears in her eyes, but the appearance of the family cat behind her gives him a needed opportunity. “Look, Bert is worried about you. He came to see if you are okay.”

Becca turns to pick Bert up and Bucky quickly yanks on some sweatpants that were draped over the footboard. He tosses Y/N her shirt that she shimmies into under the sheets. 

Becca brings Bert over and climbs into the bed, oblivious to what she walked in on. Ethan appears at the door. 

“Do you have to be so loud, Becca? You woke me up,” he complains before heading off to watch TV.

“Well that happened,” Y/N snorts.

“Rain check?” Bucky says, shaking his head in disbelief.

“What’s a rain check?” Becca asks. She attempts to climb into Bucky’s lap, but is greeted by a look of panic as he quickly shifts her back onto the bed.

“Ummm, go hug your mom, sweetheart. I’ll be right back.” He runs to the bathroom so he can safely settle down. He hears Becca telling Y/N and Bert about her bad dream. 

A few minutes later Y/N joins him in the bathroom, locking the door behind her. She strips the shirt off and hops on the counter. 

“We have five minutes before she wants me to make her waffles,” she says as she pushes Bucky’s sweats down over his hips and pulls him to her. 

“Can I have waffles too?”

“Yes, but you have to earn them first.”

“My pleasure.”


	18. All Good Things...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm posting the final two chapters at the same time. I warn you, I got angsty AF. I actually cried writing this.

“Oh, my sweet girl. I don’t know where to start. What you’ve given me is… Words don’t exist to describe you or us or how I feel about you.” Bucky clasps his hands together and he kneels down.

“I remember the first time I saw you. You were in my cell and I knew you weren’t supposed to be there. But I could sense your kindness and love. Your hands were the only hands that didn’t inflict pain on me for 70 years. Soft and gentle. No woman as beautiful as you has ever graced this earth. I’ve always called you my angel and now you truly are.”

“Dad?” Rebecca’s voice is tentative. “Are you coming with us?”

“I just need a little more time, Becca.”

Steve walks up and places a hand on Rebecca’s shoulder. “You and the family go on back to the house. I’ll make sure he gets back.”

Rebecca nods and takes one more concerned look at Bucky, who has already turned back to face the other way.

Steve walks over to Bucky and places his hand on his back. From the back, with Steve’s white hair, next to Bucky’s mostly salt with only a couple specks of pepper, no one would likely make the connection, even with their height, that they are the two epic super soldiers that have changed the history of the world. 

“Take your time, Bucky. I can wait at the car.”

Instead Bucky grabs his jacket and pulls him into a hug. He buries his face on Steve’s shoulder as sobs wrack his body.

“How do I do this without her? She was my girl for more than a century.” 

Bucky’s brokenness brings tears to Steve’s eyes. “Oh, Buck, I’m here for you. ‘Til the end of the line.”

Steve tightens his grip around Bucky as he cries.

“She gave me everything. Love, hope, safety, forgiveness, children, grandchildren. Everything that should have been lost when I fell. How can she be gone and I’m still here?”

“I know, Buck. This serum is in many ways a blessing and a curse. It has given us so much, but it also means we live long enough to lose much of what we were given. Y/N gave you a beautiful life and memories to cherish. You have to take that love and share it with your children and grandkids for the time you have left.”

“Sometimes Rebecca walks into the room and...for a moment I’m back at the compound seeing Y/N for the first time.”

“I know what you mean. Annie’s been gone for two years, but I look at Peggy and…” Steve trails off. “You and I? We’ve lost a lot, Buck. Some days I feel like I could drown under all the memories, but I focus on what we gained. It’s how I get through it. We got to live and love with friends and family that never should have been under the natural order of things. And I’m so thankful that you’ve been a part of that, that our beginning and our end will be together on our terms.”

Bucky takes a deep breath and releases Steve from his grip. He turns back to the hole with the casket covered in fresh flowers. He kneels back down and picks up a rose that slipped off the casket before it was lowered.

“I love you, babygirl. I’m yours and you are mine. Always.”

He tosses the rose onto the casket as tears stream down his face.


	19. Wedding

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And this is it. I posted the final two at the same time. Thanks for reading.

Bucky is jittery and and can’t stop wringing his hands together. 

“Take a breath, Buck. You got this.” Steve smiles at him widely. 

Bucky laughs. “I’m just ready to do this. Be married to my girl.”

The procession begins and Bucky’s and Y/N’s friends and family take their places. Steve is both the best man and the officiant.  
Y/N appears with her father and Bucky’s heart is in his throat. Oh God, she’s so beautiful in her white dress. His throat nearly aches from holding back tears.

Then she’s standing in front of him and it’s all he can do to follow what Steve is saying. He can’t take his eyes off her. Y/N’s eyes are damp as well. When he takes her in his arms to kiss her he thinks he’ll never be able to let her go.

***

As I walk down the aisle, my breath catches. Bucky is so handsome, I can’t take my eyes off him. Neither can most of the women, even my family members, including an older woman that I guess is some great aunt invited by one of my parents. 

We kiss gently and turn to face the crowd. Bucky holds me tightly as we walk back down the aisle so that my heels don’t sink into the grass. As our guests head inside the reception area, he takes me into his arms and just sways me back and forth until the photographer asks us if we’re ready. I want to run inside and touch up my makeup first and as I walk I see the old familiar woman. 

“Is she a relative?” I ask my mom. “She looks very familiar.”

“She does have a family resemblance, but I don’t know who she is.”

***

While waiting for Y/N to return, Bucky catches sight of the woman. She starts to turn away but he calls out to her. “Thank you for coming!”

She turns to him and smiles. 

He approaches. “You must be related to Y/N’s family. I see the resemblance.”

The woman nods and continues to smile silently. Bucky feels a familiar warmth in her smile. 

“Congratulations, Bucky.”

At the sound of her voice, he cocks his head and looks at her carefully. “Thank you. I’m incredibly lucky.”

“So is she.” The woman turns and starts to walk away. Bucky can’t tear his eyes away from the familiar sway of her hips.

“Wait! Do I- Will I-” Bucky hesitates and looks at the woman pleadingly. “Did I make you happy?”

They hear the door to Y/N’s dressing room open. “So very, incredibly happy, my love,” the woman says. Then she places a finger to her lips and glances toward the door Y/N is about to walk through. When Bucky looks back, she’s gone.


End file.
